So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
This is the high leading the old right now
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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