Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
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