I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
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