i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
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