I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
It's official drugs can't kill me
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
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