So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
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