so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
