take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize
