its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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