party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
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