Where are you?
In a non slutty way
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
I'm really busy with my period
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