Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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