Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
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