We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
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