Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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