He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Randomize