Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Randomize
