We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
He better not be in your backpack
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Randomize
