she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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