i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
