She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
where does the pee come out of this thing
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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