Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize
