We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
He better not be in your backpack
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
