gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
OH MY GOD I AM DYING. AS I WAS TEXTING I JUST BUMPED INTO A MOTHER FUCKING DEER. I AM SHAKING
Wait...Literally? You hit a deer...with your body?!
I PHYSICALLY RAN INTO IT. I FELT ITS WEIRD HAIR AND I EVEN APOLOGIZED CAUSE IT DINDT REGISTER THAT IT WASNT A PERSON. MORTIFIED.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
