I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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