i was rollin on her like bob the builder
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
