He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Randomize