My friends, they love my intelligence
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I didn't notice because vodka
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
Randomize
