why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
