i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
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