just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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