When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Randomize
