why didn't you poke me back
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize
