It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
