Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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