what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
