just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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