I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
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