hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Randomize
