The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Randomize
