Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
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