Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
