i wonder why nobody wants to date me...im doing a crossword at work and asked out loud: whats a 4 letter word for 'a reason to get married?'
i was like PREG?
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
she told me i tasted like america
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Randomize
