Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
We left the knife in your bed.
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Randomize
