whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Randomize
