Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
