honey bunches of taint.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
Randomize
