You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
The air was thick with penises
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
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