How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Randomize