Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
Randomize
