Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
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That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
Randomize
