the new term for farting is butt boxing.
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Randomize
